One Hidden Skill That Makes You Thrive in Tech (Hint: It’s Not Coding)
Why the best engineers succeed before they even write a line of code
Hey friends,
I want to talk about something that doesn’t usually come up in job descriptions or onboarding docs—but plays a massive role in your success once you're inside a big tech company.
It’s not your technical depth.
It’s not how many PRs you ship.
It’s not even how well you write clean code (though, yeah, please do that).
It’s social capital.
Yep. That invisible thing that can either quietly boost your career—or quietly stall it.
So... what is social capital?
Think of it like this: social capital is the trust, goodwill, and relationships you build with people around you. It’s your ability to navigate the org not just as a great engineer—but as someone others want to work with, vouch for, and support.
In simpler words: it’s who knows you, what they think of you, and how willing they are to help you.
Let me tell you a quick story.
A tale of two engineers
Let’s say you joined a new team at a well-known Big Tech company. On the second week, you paired with two senior engineers—let’s call them Alex and Jamie.
Both were brilliant. Super smart. Wrote elegant code. Deep system knowledge.
But here’s where it got interesting.
Alex had a reputation. People talked about how helpful he was, how he’d take time to explain things without making you feel dumb. If something needed cross-team alignment? Alex was the go-to. PMs trusted him. EMs looped him into early conversations. Leadership knew his name.
Jamie? Just as technically sharp—but didn’t really connect with folks. Didn’t show up to optional syncs. Never spoke unless asked. Quiet on Slack. No one really knew what he was working on.
Guess who got tapped for the high-visibility project?
Guess who was later asked to mentor mid level, junior engineers?
Guess who ended up in promo conversations?
Not because he "politicked" his way through. But because Alex had built social capital.
Why it matters more in Big Tech
Big Tech orgs are huge. There are dozens of teams, product managers, designers, engineering managers—and everyone’s juggling priorities. In this kind of environment, your work can’t always speak for itself. It needs a translator. That translator is often your reputation and relationships.
You want to:
Be the person people think of when something critical comes up
Have folks who’ll speak up for your impact in rooms you’re not in
Work on things that matter—and for that, you need to know what matters
All of that? Social capital.
How do you build social capital?
Glad you asked. Here are a few simple, low-effort ways to start:
1. Be curious about others
Ask what your teammate’s working on. Offer a small piece of help. Give props in team Slack. That one act of kindness today? It compounds.
2. Default to kindness and clarity
People remember how you made them feel, not just the bug you fixed. Don’t underestimate how far a well-written doc, a clear Slack message, or a kind word in code review can go.
3. Show up
Go to that design review. Join sometimes those optional Ask Me Anything sessions. Comment on someone’s design doc. It’s not about being a social butterfly—it’s about being visible and involved.
4. Follow through
If you say you’ll do something—do it. That’s the fastest way to earn trust, which is the core of social capital.
5. Lift others up
Shout someone out. Credit others generously. Big Tech can feel impersonal—your small human touches matter a lot.
It’s not just politics. It’s connection.
Let me be super clear: I’m not talking about playing political games or being fake. This isn’t about sucking up or gaming the system.
It’s about realizing that behind every Jira ticket and PR review is a person—and how you interact with them matters.
Because the deeper truth is: the best engineers I’ve seen succeed in Big Tech aren’t just great coders. They’re great connectors.
In closing
If you’re early in your career (or even if you’re not), and you’ve been heads-down, focusing only on shipping good code—that’s okay. I was there too.
But if you want to grow? To lead? To make real impact?
Start investing in social capital.
It’s the most underrated skill no one teaches you.
And the best part? You don’t need a new cert or course to get it. Just be curious, kind, and present.
That alone can change everything.
Until next time,
Adlet
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What would you tell your past self about the value of relationships at work? Share your thoughts in the comments!
Stay curious!